Daughters of our time
Writing by muslimama on Monday, 21 of January , 2008 at 6:49 pm
I won’t make huge claims of childhood piety…no! But, I will go as so far to say that yes, I was never allowed to forget who I was , nor my culture by my parents, and this shaped my upbringing greatly. I had several non-muslim friends in my Catholic convent school in Mumbai, India ,and studied under western influence, but was not allowed to participate in certain activities quite as freely as my friends.And they understood.I could not wear shorts to a class picnic to the beach, nor eat non vegetarian if it was not halal.I did not feel the burden of being ‘different’. So what am I getting at…?
It is now my turn…life has now come full circle, and I now have to keep my lil eleven year old daughter on the right path. That is one in which there are minimal experiences of an identity crisis, and since I’ve done it fairly well with her elder brothers, I guess it should be easy to handle this one too.
Ah! But no…this one is emotional and has several emphatic “why”s and”wherefores”.I have to deal with tantrums and tears. Boys, well, they can sort things out with logical arguments, with facts and religious evidence given … for questions like, why should I not have a girlfriend like my other buddies. And it is understood, and accepted with wisdom.
Now this one wants to know why and when is the latest possible time that she must wear a head scarf! Why certain fashionable clothes are just not worn by Muslim girls.Hah!It doesn’t seem to work quite like it did for the boys.My arguments tend to get laced with more emotion, more threats and more scariness than it did with the boys.
Was I like this and have I just forgotten? Or should I place the blame on the genes of some gran hat loves fashion till today..mmm? Or is it thanks to all these Hannah Montana and lizzies of the world that I find this battle a bit tougher, and should I worry, despite seeing her have a strong moralistic streak on most matters.
These are some of the questions that I ask myself about raising my daughter in these modern times!
Category: Raising kids, Uncategorized
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Comment by Tasmiya
Made Monday, 21 of January , 2008 at 7:21 pm
It’s so hard, isn’t it? I don’t think it’s a gender thing - my eldest (he’s only 7) is already asking me the whys and how-comes whereas my 4 year old is much more accepting of things. I have a feeling that the 4 year old will continue to be so but I will have to struggle with my 7 year old.
Comment by 
muslimama
Made Monday, 21 of January , 2008 at 9:07 pm
Yes it wasn’t that the boys didn’t ask questions or argue, but they did see reason and understand when I told them the religious basis for my advice! sigh…it’s harder to convince the lil Miss though!
